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FALL 2007
NAMASTE,
I’ve been writing about change recently because for the last year, we here at Unity Woods have been deeply involved in trying to determine the location from which we are going to run our Bethesda operations for the foreseeable future.
A brief recap of the past year’s events: our lease at Triangle Towers, where we started our flagship studio 22 years ago, ran out in April, 2006; we began a search for a new location; nearly signed a lease for a new space; that fell through; nearly signed a lease for another space; rekindled discussions with Triangle Towers.
That’s where things stood as of the last newsletter.
In response to numerous and continuing inquiries: Currently we are still negotiating with Southern Management, Triangle Towers’ management company. I am optimistic that we will be able to work out a new lease and remain in the penthouse studios and offices we presently occupy. My optimism is founded on a verbal agreement obtained several months ago between Southern Management’s commercial division director and me. The substance of that agreement is providing the basis for the nuts-and-bolts negotiations required to seal the deal. I have learned, however, that until ink is on paper, no deal exists, so my optimism is necessarily guarded. Celebrations and official announcements will come only when a new lease has been finalized and signed. We’ll keep you posted.
As you can see, change has been sitting heavily on our shoulders. But, as I wrote previously and as we all know, change is inevitable and ever-present. So what else is new?
For me, a recent development is my having to put my sister in a nursing home. She currently requires 24 hour a day care, which we are unable to give her, so we make this uncomfortable but necessary choice. She is 74 years old.
This occurrence involves a particular aspect of change, that, if fortunate, we all encounter in some fashion: ageing. It’s happening to everybody! Everywhere I look, the people I know are getting older! Me, too!
The exclamation marks are there because a note of alarm often accompanies thoughts and remarks concerning ageing. This alarm is fueled in part by our awareness, as we age, of the express train of time and its ultimate destination. We travel with, it seems, increasing speed toward the time of our own possible infirmity and inevitable demise. The commercial interests of our culture also eagerly stir up that sense of alarm as well.
The Boomers, that demographic bulge of which I am in the vanguard, are now toddling into the onset of their 60’s. (There is something slightly poetic about the children of the '60’s reaching their 60’s.) As a result, everywhere you look you see stuff about growing old: how to save for retirement, how to spend your retirement years, how to spend your retirement money, how to deal with the physical changes of ageing, the mental changes, the inevitable losses and accompanying grief, and on and on. Lots of it has an urgent and distressed tone to it. (Seems that fear and urgency are big these days, but that’s another newsletter.) Ageing is, apparently, cause for consternation.
Ironically, we Boomers are the victims of our own propaganda, as well as that willingly heaped upon us by a generally vapid and opportunistic media culture. Because of our numerical advantage, when we reached buying age back in the late ’50’s and the ’60’s, the commercial world became increasingly oriented toward our real and manufactured needs and desires. The "Youth Culture" took over, dominating music, art, literature, film, fashion, television, Madison Avenue; and what it didn’t dominate, it influenced in powerful ways. From the Who’s "Hope I Die Before I Get Old" to The Beatles’ "When I’m 64", youth was the ideal and age was the enemy.
Well, now that 64 is right around the corner for the early Boomers, the continuing worship of youth tends to leave the middle-aged and elderly with the empty feeling that the only thing that is really worthwhile, the fun and frolic of youth, has passed. So the same commercial culture that sold us hot cars, sexy clothes, and heavy metal forty years ago, now sells us denial. Hide your gray hair, cover up your wrinkles, get a nip here and a tuck there, and... Presto! You’re good as new! Young Again! Joan Rivers as the portrait of Dorian Grey.
How sad that we have created and bought into (literally) a value system that denigrates something that, in so many other parts of the world, is accepted and honored. In India, for example, elders are traditionally treated with dignity. When Mr. Iyengar visited in October of 2005, we held a reception for him before the evening program at Lisner Auditorium. Many people came and sat at his feet to pay their respects. Yet when my mother-in-law, who is 91 years old and sharp as a tack, was ushered over to meet him, he rose to his feet and greeted her in a most respectful and deferential manner. She was his senior, and he gave her her due.
One might expect, then, that the yoga world would have a more enlightened attitude toward ageing. Unfortunately, the commercial yoga world is not immune to the same sort of behavior as its non-yoga counterparts. If you search online under "yoga and ageing", you will be confronted with the "Anti-Ageing Benefits of Yoga", "Reverse Aging Through Yoga", "The War On Aging" (!) "Look Young Again Forever" (!!), and on and on. Yoga Journal touts its newsletter as "anti-ageing tonic". You will find scores of books, DVD’s, workshops, and conferences on "anti-ageing". This is the same sort of sensationalistic drivel the mainstream media employs to sell its and its advertisers’ wares, preying on fear and hope. What a disappointment to see so much of the yoga world making the same superficial, money-driven compromises most of the mainstream media make.
Ageing, first of all, is the passage of time. Because we are all subject to the passage of time, "anti-ageing" or "reverse-ageing" is nonsense. The truth is that unless you’ve got a time machine tucked away in your attic, you cannot reverse ageing.
Ageing is also a process, and this process is subject to a variety of influences. Not the fact of our ageing but how we age is really the issue at stake, and that is the area where the study and practice of yoga, as distinct from the buying and selling of yoga, can play a powerful role. The asanas (postures) and pranayama (breathing) have direct and significant effects on the functioning of our bodies. They can provide us with the enhanced circulation of blood, lymph, and energy that will allow our bones, muscles, organs, and glands the opportunity to function at their optimum. Learning to align ourselves physically and energetically, as yoga teaches us, greatly reduces the wear and tear that usually accompanies ageing and allows us the possibility of moving into and through our older years with grace.
On another level, the meditative and discriminating state of mind that comes with regular practice can offer a perspective that will help us deal more wisely with ageing’s inevitable challenges and stresses. Stress, studies show, is a primary cause of wear and tear on mind and body. By learning the art of relaxation and developing an attitude of contentment (santosha) and awareness, we can become less resistant to the irresistible and more attuned to the healthy and helpful paths yoga presents to us.
Yet even the ancient yogis experienced the desire to resist ageing and to cling to life. Patanjali says in the Yoga Sutras (11:9), "Self-preservation or attachment to life is the subtlest of all afflictions. It is found even in wise men." And if this philosophy strikes you as alien and defeatist, consider Christ’s dictum, "Whosoever will save his life shall lose it; and whosoever will lose his life for my sake will find it."
As the sand in our hourglass trickles ceaselessly from top to bottom, instead of attempting to cling futilely to the fading attributes of youth, we can learn through our practice of yoga to see ageing as simply a manifestation of the normal flow of events, an inevitable and invaluable part of living to be embraced and, yes, enjoyed. If we can begin to clear our vision and accept where and who we are and adjust our practice to inevitably changing physical and mental capabilities, we are much less likely to waste precious time and resources attempting to stem the inexorable tide of time. Instead, we can embrace the heightened wisdom and broader vantage point that can come with ripened years and dance with delight into our dwindling days.
p.s. Our fall discussion (on October 28) will dig a little more deeply into the issue of ageing and, more specifically, into how to adjust your practice to live your later years more fully. You’re invited to come share your thoughts, observations and questions.
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